It is February 14, 2026, and love is in the air. Valentine’s Day is a highly anticipated romantic holiday that many choose to celebrate, and it is not just for couples. People celebrate it with big romantic gestures, flowers, cards, chocolates, and more, but there is a dark side to it all. One of the origins of Valentine’s Day dates back to the Romans, when it was dark and bloody.
Violent Origin
The Romans celebrated Valentine’s Day with violence, specifically the feast of Lupercalia. From February 13 through February 15, the brutish men would sacrifice a goat and a dog, then whip the women with the hides of the animals they had slain.
In 2011, a religious studies professor at Yale University told NPR the Roman romantics “were drunk. They were naked.” Apparently, young women would line up for men to hit them because they believed it would make them fertile.
During the so-called festival, the Romans would hold a matchmaking lottery in which young men would draw the names of women from a jar, and they would couple up for the duration, with the potential for longer if they meshed well.
Coining The Holiday Name
It is also believed that ancient Romans are responsible for the modern name we know as Valentine’s Day. On February 14, in the third century, Emperor Claudius II executed two men both named Valentine, but in separate years. The Catholic Church honored their deaths by celebrating St. Valentine’s Day.
By the fifth century, St. Valentine’s Day and Lupercalia were combined by Pope Gelasius I to dismiss the pagan rituals. The festival became more theatrical, and “It was a little more of a drunken revel, but the Christians put clothes back on it. That didn’t stop it from being a day of fertility and love,” Lenski said.
At the same time, the Normans celebrated Galatin’s Day, which meant “lover of women,” and can be associated with modern times’ Galentine’s Day, where women get together to celebrate their friendships and love for one another. It is believed that the two former celebrations got confused at some point because they sounded similar.
As society progressed in the next years, the holiday became less violent and crude, but it remains chaotic. It became more romanticized, especially when Chaucer and Shakespeare used it in their work and pushed the new narrative through Britain and the rest of Europe. Handmade paper cards were even popularized in the Middle Ages, and were known as the tokens du jour.
New Era of Valentine’s Day
Valentine’s Day traditions flowed into the New World in the 19th century during the Industrial Revolution, introducing factory-made cards. In 1913, the mass production of Hallmark Cards began in Kansas City, Missouri. Ever since then, Valentine’s Day has been known to be overdramatized and capitalistic. The economy booms during this holiday.
Helen Fisher, a sociologist at Rutgers University, said the holiday is now spoiled, and we have no one to blame but ourselves. “This isn’t a command performance,” she said. “If people didn’t want to buy Hallmark cards, they would not be bought, and Hallmark would go out of business.”
True Meaning of Valentine’s Day
For many, this holiday is about being in a long-term committed relationship filled with love and seeing how much you are loved by the gifts that are given to you. However, that is not the true meaning. Valentine’s Day is about sharing your love with those around you, whether it be your partner, your mother, your father, your siblings, etc. And there are more ways to show your love than giving in to capitalism. Bring back handwritten cards and silly matchmaking traditions, but keep away from all the violence.
Tell someone you love them today, and share with them how much you appreciate them. ♥️
